At the Table With: Jordan Santos

Ft. a bouquet of calla lilies and a pile of book recs

At The Table With is a monthly interview series that explores the ideas of creativity and personal taste through the eyes of my friends (or people I would like to be friends with). This month’s guest is Seen Library’s Jordan Santos!

My friendship with Jordan began with a bit of a meet-cute. In early 2020, right before the pandemic, I was invited to a big Reese’s Book Club event at this massive house in Bel Air where I just knew I wouldn’t know a single soul. I often skip things like this—the thought of hovering alone near a snack table looking for someone to talk to breaks me out in hives—but the prospect of getting to snoop around this Selling Sunset-esque house lured me in. Just as I predicted, I got there, recognized no one, and beelined for the furthest corner of the patio to hide in peace.

Jordan and I were the type of Instagram acquaintances where you’re like, is that her? Would she know who I am? So when I spotted her from afar I thought I’d be brave and introduce myself. I loved Jordan’s style and always had, but throughout the years I’d learned so much from the information she shared about social issues, that I’d come to know her as a very considerate, compassionate, intentional person who also dressed really, really well.

Images via Jordan Santos.

Now that I’ve gotten to know her a bit since, I can confirm that Jordan is all of those things and more. Some of my most memorable conversations about the industry we work in and how to navigate it have been ones we’ve shared over a morning matcha in our shared corner of town. We all have our feelings about social media, influencer culture, brand world, and the rest, but I especially appreciate her perspective, a lot of which she shares on her Substack,

no one asked by jordan santos

. I know that what she writes resonates with a lot of you, too—you’ve probably seen “Twenty Things I’d Rather Do Than Be on my Phone” or “It’s OK To Be Curated” floating around the Substack-sphere.

Jordan started Seen Library in 2021, which we get into in our chat below, and in 2023 she and I cohosted a Seen Library x Pasta Girlfriend dinner party and book exchange. Jordan wrapped books with themes around food and community in white paper, then carefully handwrote clues to the plot of each so guests could choose a story based on its content, not its cover. I decorated the table and designed the menu, and alongside twenty-or-so other women, we sat at a long table sharing bowls of pasta and favorite book recs well into the night.

Jordan and I walked away from that evening so excited. Most of the women who had bought tickets came by themselves and left with a new friend or two, and we both felt energized by the idea that we could facilitate a meaningful experience for someone rooted in the idea that you can just unabashedly love what you love, whether that be curling up with a good book or a bowl of cacio e pepe. I’ve attended several Seen Library pop-ups since, and each one is a really lovely display of connection, curiosity, and togetherness thanks to Jordan’s thoughtful approach to it all.

I asked Jordan a few questions…

Ali LaBelle: First things first, tell us a little about yourself.

Jordan Santos: I was born and raised in and near Los Angeles to Filipino immigrants. I am someone who tries to be honest and curious and thoughtful. I love to spend time with my loved ones and my cat, I love to travel, I love to read, and I love to have long, meandering conversations with my friends. I have worked in social media for the past 12 years, primarily consulting with various brands, businesses, and personalities while also doing content creation on my personal account. In 2021, I started a book community where I host various gatherings to prompt conversation and connection through books, called Seen Library.

AL: How did Seen Library start? As someone who also loves a passion project, I’d love to hear its origin story.

JS: Unofficially, the beginnings of Seen Library really started back in 2015, simply because I wanted to get friends together in a new, fun way. I saw a photo of a “blind date with a book” on Tumblr and wanted to try it out with friends. I had five of us (friends and my cousins) meet at a park and told everyone to bring a book wrapped with clues written on top. It wasn’t very chic at all—we all reused paper grocery bags and took a sharpie to scribble some clues. I then began doing them here and there through 2019, and over time more friends and acquaintances became interested in joining. When Covid lockdowns happened in 2020, they were put on pause.

I had been working in the social media industry since 2013, and around 2020 or 2021 I felt social media shifting away from being a tool for connection and becoming a tool for self-promotion, whether for a brand or an individual. I know I myself contributed to that and still do! But I guess that realization kind of made me disillusioned about an industry I initially loved and had so much fun working in.

During that time I read Severance by Ling Ma, which made me reflect and think seriously about my relationship with work and, more importantly, who I am and what I do outside of work. It was then that I committed to cutting back on work and decided I would make less money and take on fewer clients so that I could figure out what I really wanted to do with my time.

I realized two things: (1) how much I enjoyed reading and putting together these book-centered gatherings, and (2) that I wasn't necessarily sick of working in social media, but that I just really missed that feeling of connectivity I enjoyed so much in its early days—meeting new people and actually getting to know them. I wanted to find a way to get that back, which is why I created Seen Library, officially. I loved the conversations and relationships that formed from the book exchanges I was hosting and saw how different they were from the conversations I was having at the brand-centered events I was going to and the people I was meeting through work.

In 2021, I started Seen Library and brought the book exchanges back with more intention as a way to get not only existing friends together but also like-minded people who may not already know each other, in hopes that it would lay the foundation for new friendships.

Since then, Seen Library has evolved as interest in it has grown. The book exchanges turned into “book givings,” where I curate books for people to choose from with a guided discussion, and I also began doing pop-ups, book drives, meet-ups, and volunteer days with an organization called Reading to Kids.

AL: I’ve had the privilege of watching Seen Library evolve over the years from intimate gatherings to pop-up shops with lines around the block. But I also know that it has grown intentionally and cautiously—you’re discerning when it comes to expanding its reach. Can you tell me a little bit about what you see for Seen Library’s future and what you hope to preserve in the process?

JS: To be honest, I’m not sure because I don’t even know myself! It sounds weird, but I’ve really been trying to focus on the present and not look too far into the future. I want to savor what’s happening now and let what I’m feeling at this moment inform my next steps.

What I do know is that I want to bring Seen Library to more cities, and my top priority is to keep it small, thoughtful, intimate, and people-centered, always.

AL: Some people read to escape, or to relax, or to live vicariously through a character, but you seem to mostly read to learn. Am I right in saying that? What does your relationship to reading look like? Do you find pleasure in it?

JS: I wouldn’t say I mostly read to learn; I would say I mostly read to feel. I think reading is incredible for a multitude of reasons—to escape, to relax, to live vicariously through another, like you said. But I think when it’s used as a way to tap into something deeper, to understand ourselves or the world or the people around us more, that’s when something beautiful happens.

I absolutely find pleasure in reading—I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t! I would say my relationship with reading is fun, relaxing, and enjoyable but, at the same time, intentional and thoughtful. I try to approach reading the way I approach lots of different things in my life, whether it be with people or my wardrobe or with my spare time.

What we consume—whether it be books, films, or TikToks—influences us so much and I think it’s so important that we are intentional with what we read because it really does influence the way we move through the world and how we interact with others.

AL: If you were to recommend three books that have made a big impact on you, fiction or nonfiction, what would you choose and why?

JS: Off the top of my head…

1. Severance by Ling Ma, the book that indirectly pushed me to start Seen Library. It’s like a zombie apocalypse story except what’s to fear is modern society and our obsession with consumption, productivity, and mindless routine. It captured so much of how I had been feeling about hustle culture and reminded me of a podcast I listened to and loved called “The Case Against Loving Your Job”. The episode talks about internalized capitalism and how our goal should be to work less, in general, and to enjoy the things we love in life, rather than to find a job that we can’t escape from. This book was a good reminder to rethink our lives of mindless repetition and soulless routine and find the balance between earning a living and making enough to do what makes us feel alive.

2. Still Born by Guadalupe Nettel. It’s a complex, nuanced perspective on motherhood and womanhood that is often untold. It explores the difficult decisions in becoming a mother, the regrets that sometimes come with that, and the unconventional ways one can parent. It’s a reminder that in the individualistic world we have today, what we may need most are multiple people coming together to care for and raise a child—that it’s not something you can or should do alone. I related so much to the mixed feelings that the characters had about motherhood in contrast to the “just do it” messages I’ve gotten from elders and even peers. And it was comforting to hear the different sides of motherhood—the beauty and also the immense pain and the multitude of emotions that can come with it.

3. Beauty Sick by Renee Engeln. Around the time I read this book, I was with friends and [the topic of] plastic surgery came up. One said that since everyone was doing it, it was only a matter of time before we did too, otherwise we’d “fall behind.” Another friend agreed and said her job depended on it. While I vehemently disagreed, I sadly understood where their thinking came from—we do live in a world where beauty is currency and is often valued above most else. Reading this book gave me a sense of relief that someone was working hard to turn the spotlight onto the current harmful obsession with beauty, and it reminded me that my views on embracing aging don’t have to be archaic. Engeln asks: What if we tried to change this culture that puts so much value on beauty (which oftentimes means thin, young, able-bodied, etc.) instead of clinging to and upholding unattainable beauty standards we physically can’t hold onto forever? What are we going to do and how will we feel when our appearance changes? Will we look back and wish we built a different foundation?

I also just finished Parable of the Sower by Octavia Butler and have to add that in. As dark as this dystopian story is, it’s so beautiful in the way she writes and in the way she provides glimmers of hope and faith. While you are presented with the worst of people—people who have lost everything and who resort to violence and chaos—you also see the best peek through—people who still care for the old, the young and the poor, people who, despite everything, want to make things better, learn things, and be in community and trust others. While our current world is so bleak at the moment, somehow reading a fiction of a world that’s worse makes me feel better and reminds me that if they can find hope, kindness, and empathy in that world, I better find it in mine, too.

AL: Let’s do a little visualization exercise! Imagine your dream dinner party. You can invite anyone (living or not, famous or not), serve anything, and host it anywhere. Where’s the party?

JS: Somewhere breathtaking: a traditional ryokan in Kyoto, in the middle of the Jardin des Tuileries in Paris, or on the white rocks of Sarakiniko Beach in Milos.

AL: What’s on the table? How are you decorating?

JS: It’s beautiful but minimal to let our surroundings do the talking. There are probably calla lilies and candles and dinnerware atop a creamy tablecloth and not much else.

AL: Who’s invited?

JS: My closest friends and family, people I want to spend hours talking to and laughing with.

Vintage Milos postcard, vintage Kyoto postcard, vintage Jardin des Tuileries postcard, placemat, napkin, napkin rings, lychee martini

AL: What are you wearing?

JS: I guess it depends where we land—Kyoto, Paris, or Milos! Nothing fancy, though.

AL: What’s on the menu? What are we drinking?

JS: Seafood with all my favorite things—oysters, crab, sushi, caviar… As for drinks, mocktails and tequila cocktails with lychee or passionfruit.

AL: What music is playing?

JS: Soul, R&B, smooth jazz… "It's Too Late" by Carole King, "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac, "What's Going On" by Marvin Gaye, and "It Ain't Over 'Til It's Over" by Lenny Kravitz are on the playlist.

AL: Quick fire round. What’s your favorite scent or smell?

JS: Mint.

AL: Favorite artist?

JS: I went to a Danielle Mckinney exhibit with a friend and really, really loved her work.

Read The Room, Danielle Mckinney, 2024

AL: Last thing you read?

JS: Parable of the Sower by Octavia Butler.

AL: Comfort food?

JS: Sinigang, a tamarind-based Filipino soup.

AL: Something you bought recently?

JS: I was naughty and splurged on a vintage Cartier Mini Tank sourced from Sourcewhere.

For more from Jordan, be sure to follow her on Instagram here and keep an eye on Seen Library for book events in LA and beyond! (She has one planned for April, but sadly it’s already sold out.)

x

Ali

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